Stuff.

November 14th marked World Diabetes Day. Last year, Diabetes Awareness Month was something I was all over. I took part in the Postcard Exchange, I blogged, I took part in the Big Blue Test with the help of the mySugr app. I made the decision to get involved, and I enjoyed it. 

This year, however, I've felt blue (unintentional pun, but one I am keeping there).

Diabetes hasn't been smooth-sailing recently. I've had highs I can't explain. I've made adjustments, and been rewarded with lows. Cannulas have been coming loose before their three days is up. I've caught my pump tubing and ripped out the site, more times than I'd like to count. These things happen, yes, but just recently it seems constant. 

As a result, there's been digital tumbleweed here. I've not been as happy in my personal life (direct correlation between my blood sugars/diabetes management in general and my mood). Finding the motivation to self-care has been hard to come by. And no motivation to self-care makes my life very messy, very quickly.

It's not burnout. At least, it doesn't feel like burnout. And it's not a pity party. It's just stuff. Diabetes stuff that, for the last week and a bit, I've wished I could erase from my life. 

But no can do.

So I'm writing, hoping that by talking out my frustrations here, my head will feel clearer, and I can start finding that get-up-and-go to take better care of myself.

Tomorrow's a new day. And Monday is a new week.