Hello, Blog!

"That there is your insulin pump, and that there is a monster taking it. But you get it back."
I write here, honest! I needed to take some time out (as you may have noticed from the digital tumbleweed here). But I feel ready to start sharing again. So, hello again, blog! 

The One Where I Ran 10km.

On Sunday, 12th July 2015, E.Hales and I woke up, donned our pinkest clothes (read: I stole one of her very many pink tops - I'm not a pink person) and made our way to our local Race for Life. If you don't know, Race for Life is a run in aid of Cancer Research UK. You can run, jog or walk 10km, 5km, or take part in the Pretty Muddy 5km assault course (which we're looking to do next year). It's a very pink day and it's awesome!

This was my first 10km run. I hadn't done as much training as I wanted to - a combination of work, other commitments and a bit of exercise burnout left me feeling a little unprepared, but that feeling didn't last too long. When you take part in a Race for Life event, everyone has a sign on their back that says why they're taking part.

The. Biggest. Motivator. Ever.

We heard some people share their experiences. We had a minutes silence to think of all those that are battling cancer, have lost their lives to cancer and have kicked cancer's butt. We warmed up. We ran. (Most of it, anyway. A blood sugar of 18.8mmol after 5km left me confused and not all there, taking a correction bolus and chugging a bottle of water.) We crossed the finish line. We hugged. We cried. We gratefully accepted the brioche that was being offered to us at the end (blood sugar clocked in at 12mmol by the end of the race). We happily accepted our medals. We clapped and cheered others as they ran/jogged/walked. We were united, with one aim: cure all cancers.

So I (mostly) ran. For those battling cancer. For those that have lost their lives to cancer. For those that have survived cancer. For my future. For my family's future. For the next generation's future.

Here's to kicking cancer's butt.

Merry Christmas!

Whoever you are, where ever you are, I wish you a very happy, and healthy, Christmas!

Source.

A Blogging Break.

A bit of a disjointed post today, with ramblings separated by pictures.

1. After my last blog post, I took a break from blogging/the diabetes online community in general. I seriously underestimated just how many people read this blog. The support I received came in many shapes and sizes, from comments and emails to retweets. I was blown away, and a little (very) overwhelmed by it. It was the sheer number of them all combined that led me to take a break - it made me seriously think about what I write here and what pictures I use. However, after numerous discussions with various people, the point still stands that blogging is my diabetes therapy, and I think being part of this community helps me more than it hinders me. I am incredibly grateful for the kind words I received. I don't think I said it at the time, so I'm saying it now: THANK YOU! Since writing that post, I re-did my food diary and sent it off. My appointment with my DSN is later this month, so watch this space.   

2. A couple of weekends ago I spent the day in London hanging out with the fabulous people pictured above and below this point. The DOC is great, but spending time with these people in real life is good for my soul, whether we've been friends for a few years or only met that day.  

3. I have a new job! Well, I still work at the same place I did before, but in a different office, with different people, where I have my own desk, more responsibility and slightly better working hours (8am-4pm instead of 7am-3pm - that extra hour in the mornings is making a huge difference to my day!) So, I'm back to reworking the routine to get my basal rates right.

4. Time seems to be moving so fast at the moment. You'll notice that since I graduated from uni and started a job, the frequency of blog posts is decreasing. Blogging is my diabetes therapy and something I enjoy. Writing is slowly beginning to form a part of my job role, and not something I want to give up. Once things have settled down at work, I'm hoping I'll have more time to write. Because this blogging bubble of mine is something I'm proud of, and I'm not ready to walk away from it yet (also, see point [1]).

5. This is my first December blog post, and I've not said the obvious yet: MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

THIS!

As a huge comic-book movie fan (Batman, Spiderman, Guardians of the Galaxy, Avengers, Captain America...honestly couldn't choose a favourite), this, in my eyes, is EFFING AWESOME!

Source.

"Iron Man is one busy superhero. After teaming last month with pint-sized heroes Blue Ear and Sapheara to educate about hearing loss and cochlear implants, the armoured Avenger is now turning his attention to childhood diabetes." (Source)

SO COOL! CAPS AND EVERYTHING!  

2:1.

Two numbers.

2:1.

A second-class honours, upper division.

That's what I'll be graduating with July 24th.

So happy!

Image taken from Google Images.

DiaBuzzfeed.

DiaBuzzfeed:

Stumbled upon it;

Clicked on it;

Laughed at it;

Now it's bookmarked as one of my favourites.

Go check it out! 

New Year, New Layout.

As you can see, this blog has undergone a bit of a makeover. 

I wish I could say it was all my hard work. That I spent hours going over coding trying to make it look the way it does now.

But it wasn't and I didn't.

Huge thank you to Lizzie for this. 

I'll do my very best not to break anything!

I hope you all like the new layout!

Happy New Year!

Wishing you all the best for 2014!

Saying Goodbye To 2013.

I love New Year's! To take a quote from the film New Year's Eve:

"[it's] a time for us to reflect upon our triumphs and our missteps - our promises made and broken. The time we opened ourselves up to great adventure - or closed ourselves down for fear of getting hurt. Because that's what New Year's is all about: getting another chance. A chance to forgive, to do better, to do more, to give more, to love more. To stop worrying about 'what if' and start embracing what would be."

This year has been a busy one. 

I bid Toulouse "au revoir" back in January and moved to Alcalá. Things got difficult, but it led to me starting this blog, and for some reason or another you're reading it! I also got more involved in the diabetes community, which has done wonders for my emotional wellbeing. I "celebrated" my three year diabetes anniversary. I travelled. I made mistakes and celebrated successes, both diabetically-speaking and in my personal life. Circle D celebrated its 5th birthday. I took part in Diabetes Blog Week, Diabetes Week, No D Day and Diabetes Awareness Month, which comprised of World Diabetes Day and the WDD Postcard Exchange. I went to events (HPD's Greater Minds Inspire and the DUK Big Event), taking my online friends offline.

My godson turned 2 back in February. I finally got my butt Stateside and met up with one of my favourites, Lopez. I celebrated turning 21. I survived my first semester back at uni after year abroad and learnt that sleep's over-rated. One of my friends got engaged. 

I'm so excited to see what 2014 brings!

 

I Hate Coming Up With Titles!

I really, really do!

Anyway, here's a Christmas quiz I borrowed from Elizabeth, who stole it from Allison (who blogs at With Faith and Grace and then talks diabetes at The Blood Sugar Whisperer)

Without further ado...

1. What is your must-watch holiday movie?

I can't choose: Home Alone (the first one is the best), The Holiday, Love Actually, Serendipity, The Family Stone, Miracle on 34th Street, Jack Frost, New Years Eve, A Christmas Carol (all and any versions), The Polar Express...I could go on and on!

 
 2. What is your must-do holiday activity?

Wrapping Christmas presents whilst watching a Christmas movie (see question one) and drinking Baileys. 

3. What's your favourite holiday dish?

Mince pies! We can only ever buy them around the holidays and they're so good and worth every bit of insulin I have to shoot for them!

4. What's your favourite holiday drink?

Starbucks toffee nut latte is my absolute favourite! Very bolus-worthy!

5. Christmas cookies: store bought, from scratch, neither?

From scratch!

6. Which Christmas song do you have on repeat?

O Holy Night, the Il Divo version. Gives me goosebumps. And I love Ave Maria. Again, goosebumps.

7. When do you put your Christmas tree up?

Mum and Dad put it up when my sister and I returned home after our semester at uni. However, when I get my own place (i.e. not a student house), that tree will be up December 1st, no questions asked!

8. Do you have a favourite ornament?

No. But, when I actually become a grown-up (because, let's be honest, being a student doesn't make you a grown up!) I don't doubt that I will be that person that has a favourite ornament! It'll probably be something Disney related!

9. Where is Santa Claus coming to visit this year?

My parent's house.

10. What is on your holiday wish list?

See last week's Five for Friday! 

11. Open presents: Christmas eve or Christmas morning?

Christmas morning, definitely! I have so many memories of that as a kid!

12. Can you sing the entire "Twelve Days of Christmas" without missing a single item?

I'm gonna say yes, but I can't guarantee said items will be in the right order!   

Giving Thanks.

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them." - JFK.

Retiro Park, Madrid.

I know that Thanksgiving isn't an English holiday, but since I started university in 2010 and lived with an American exchange student, it's something I have acknowledged every year since then.

I love the concept of Thanksgiving; the whole taking time out to actually reflect on what we're thankful for. Let's be honest, how often do we actually take the time out to do that?! I know I don't, and I really, really should, as I have a lot to be thankful for: my family, my friends, my health (yes, I know I have diabetes, but I still have my health!), access to healthcare and prescriptions, I could continue, but I won't bore you with my list.

Instead, I ask you to do something. This evening (or morning, or afternoon, depending on where you are in the world) take some time out to think about what you're thankful for. Maybe even tell someone you're thankful for them. How you go about it is up to you. But just because Thanksgiving is an American Holiday, there's no reason why we can't, or shouldn't, "take part" too.

Whoever you are, where ever you are, I wish you a very Happy Thanksgiving!

 

The Day After Turning 21.

Yesterday was a good day: I had a lovely day with family and friends, I had a fun night with the girls (alcohol obviously included) and I got absolutely spoilt rotten! And there was cake. Giant French Fancy. Which I somehow managed to bolus correctly for. And I'm not hungover. A successful birthday, if you ask me!

Twenty-One.

My 17th birthday was my last birthday pre-diabetes. I don't remember much about it if I'm honest. I think some friends and I took a picnic to a local park and spent the day there. I'm not a birthday person, so I never really do anything big. 

I've never really been one to think too much about the future. Until now, that is. Now, I kind of need to as I need an "after uni" plan. But before now, I never really have. However, when I think back to my 17th, I know for a fact that I did not expect to be where I am now.

Today is my 21st birthday. 

And although I didn't expect this life when I was 17, I wouldn't change any of it. Okay...I'd quite like to give my beta cells (which I imagine to look like the minions from Despicable Me. Random thought, I know) a jump start...but, at the same time, I'd quite like to keep what came as a result of that. 

Yes, okay, I was diagnosed with type one diabetes, but I also finished sixth form having passed most of my A-Levels and I got a place at university. My best friend from school is at the same university as me. Awesome. I got so lucky with my housemates in my first year. So much so that I lived with them in my second year, and living with some again when I go back in September. I became Auntie Vicki. I passed my first year at uni. And my second. I lived abroad. In two countries, which was pretty cool. I finally got involved with the diabetes online community. I started this blog. 

It's taken a fair amount of time, but I finally feel like I've found "me" again.

And I'm excited to see what comes next.

Can And Will.

The beautiful Toledo.

I've been doing a lot of thinking and soul-searching lately. Dangerous, I know, but once you start, it's pretty hard to stop; I opened that box that I had tightly sealed for a good three years, and once it was open, there was no closing it! It started when some family came to visit me in Alcalá and that million dollar question was asked: what am I gonna do when I finish university? What comes next for me? These questions have been causing me to freak out for the better part of the last two weeks!

Like I wrote a few weeks ago, I have no idea where I want my life to go after university, and I am still clueless, that much hasn't changed. But one thing that has changed since then is my attitude. I wrote in my post "The Future" that I wanted, and needed, to start "dreaming big" again and stop being afraid. My future is something I can control, to an extent, so I need to stop "floating" and get some direction whilst I still can. There are so many opportunities out there, I just need to go find them.

I still don't know what my "big dream" is, but what I do know that I can and I will accomplish "it", whatever "it" may be. One thing I am sure of, however, is that whatever happens, as long as I have my family and my friends, I will be absolutely fine. With their support, I can achieve anything and get to where I want to be. 

"Dark And Twisty" No More!

Ellen and I at Vodka Revs.

My friend Ellen and I have always been known as the "glass half empty" girls in our group of friends back home; the ones that provide the reality check and think very logically. It's why we get on: we think the same. Ellen's the friend that I refer to as my "person" (Grey's Anatomy reference, as is the title of this post (may as well reference everything at once!)): she's the one I'd call upon if I'd murdered someone and needed help disposing of the body. She is the Christina Yang to my Meredith Grey (or the Meredith Grey to my Christina Yang...I'm not really sure!)

Well, neither of us are sure why, but recently we have found ourselves having a more "glass half full" outlook on things, and I don't think we ever thought we'd say this, but we're liking the change! I'm definitely liking the change! I mean, I was by no means negative all the time, but I was never this positive and just generally happy either.

I've been trying to work out what's changed for the both of us. Because this transition seems to have happened to the both of us at the same time. When I read Ruben's The Happiness Project, the other nugget of information I took from her writings (the "happiness box" being the first which you can read about here) was that we're happier when those around us are happy. Have we had that affect on each other? I've noticed a definite change in my mood and outlook since getting back on track with my diabetes. I'd never really taken the time to see just how much poor control affected my mood, but I can 100% say that, for me personally, there is a correlation between good sugar levels and what my mood is like. As well, living abroad has definitely made me more independent and confident: I can see that change in me. I've also lost weight, feel like I am generally healthier (insulin omitting situation aside) and a hell of a lot more grateful for my family, friends and other various support networks. Are all of these things contributing to my level of happiness?

As for Ellen: she joined the gym after I returned to Toulouse and goes various times a week. She feels more energised, eats better, has generally more productive days, has recently become a Godmother again to a gorgeous baby girl whose cuteness definitely does rival that of our Godson's (can't believe I just admitted that!!)  I think these are clear contributors to her happiness. 

And if we put these together: is the fact she's happier than I've seen her in a long time making me happy and vice-versa?! Either way, it needs to continue! It has been more than a while since we were both in a "happy place" at the same time! It's always been one of us is good, the other's not. Here's hoping this lasts a while!

The Future.

Where will I be in 5 years?

The future isn't something I like to think about. I like my life as it is, and I don't want things to change anytime soon. Today, my Nan, Aunt and Uncle arrived in Alcalá, and they're here visiting me for a few days. I met them after teaching and took them for lunch and coffee whilst we waited for the Spanish siesta to finish in order to go and do all the tourist things round Alcalá. Whilst I was happily sat there drinking my decaf coffee and eating a muffin, I was asked the million dollar question that has been playing on my mind recently: what are my plans when I finish uni?

I haven't got a clue! But the time has come, it seems, to start seriously thinking about coming up with some kind of plan as to where I want my life to go after uni. Anyone that knows me knows that I don't do future planning. I can just about think about the next two months, if that! I'm quite relaxed and just take things as they come. However, graduating from university is a big deal, and, as much as I hate to admit it, I need a life plan. Well, a plan for at least the first few years after uni, anyway! It's just for someone like me, who doesn't really plan for anything, it's quite a scary thing to contemplate!

It's strange: three years ago, I had life plans. I knew exactly what I wanted and how I was going to realise my goals. I had job plans, knew I wanted to get married, have kids, the works: I used my head, followed my heart, and nothing could get in my way. Then diabetes came along, and something changed. I don't know what it was exactly, but something did. I stopped following my heart, started over thinking everything, and just stopped thinking big. I learnt that things aren't always going to go your way. I mean, it's not that I was naive and thought life was going to be easy, but at 17 I wasn't exactly expecting the diagnosis of a chronic illness like diabetes either!

Over the last three years, I have accomplished a lot, things I didn't think were possible back when I was diagnosed. I passed my A Levels for a start, and got into UEA, where I have had the most amazing time, and have made some life-long friends. I started SDUK with Lizzie, and although still small, a huge achievement that has helped a lot of people. I've moved abroad and lived in two different countries. Okay, none of these have been easy to achieve, but they are achievements nonetheless, and it's because of these success stories that I find myself wanting to "dream big" again. Start following my heart a bit more (whilst still using my head, of course!) Create a version of the future I wanted when I was 17, because at 20, things are a little different now! Nonetheless, it is definitely time to start trying to think big again, and stop being afraid.  

Life In A Day.

Guadalajara, Spain.

Life In A Day is a movie-documentary that I am now recommending to everybody! A friend recommended it to me, and when she first explained the concept, I was confused by how it was going to be put together, but I thought it was so incredibly well done. I laughed, cried, smiled, felt heart-broken: it really was an emotional rollercoaster, and a real eye-opener.

Basically, it is a series of video clips that people took and then sent in. The one thing they have in common is that they were all filmed on the same day: July 24th, 2010. The clips come from countless different people, spanning 190 different countries, so the clips you see vary greatly, as you can imagine!

It put a lot of things into perspective for me. I like to think that, on the whole, I am generally a happy person. Like everyone, I have my down days, but I think that more that 75% of the time, I am in a happy mood. Recently, I have had major diabetes problems: I went back down that omitting insulin route and it was just generally not a good time for me. But watching something like Life In A Day really made me realise just how lucky I am for everything I have. For a start, I have access to a free healthcare system and prescriptions, meaning I can actually stay alive! Then there's my actual family, my chosen family, my friends. I think I can say, in actual fact, I have it quite easy! Yes, there will come a time when, once again, diabetes will beat me. But, in keeping with my last two posts, I need to make more of an effort to remember the good and the words of encouragement of those around me. And if that fails, then I'm pretty sure re-watching this movie-documentary will do the trick! 

Click here to watch Life In A Day on Youtube.