Lost Trust.

BS Level upon surfacing this morning.

After the stubborn hypo of Sunday night, I was rather nervous about going to sleep last night. No...I was very nervous, and didn't really sleep, just what you need when you've got a day full of classes and deadlines (today is going to be one of those days where I definitely turn to caffeine after a month of none!) I just didn't trust my body.

When I'm awake, I can catch my hypos more or less instantly, usually before they get below 3.5mmol/l. Yes, there have been times when my blood sugar (BS) level is significantly lower than this, but on the whole I can nip hypos in the bud before they get to the 2s. 

Last night, my BS levels were 10.1mmol/l before bed. After the night before, I did not correct this, prefering to sleep through the night and wake up on a 7/8mmol/l than risk over-correcting and having to deal with a hypo in the middle of the night. For me, a level of 10.1 is more than okay to go to sleep on. But could I?! Nope! I drifted in and out of sleep waking up every hour or so. I resisted testing every hour for two reasons: 1) my poor fingertips and 2) I knew I wasn't hypo: no shakiness, no sweating, nothing. Yet sleep just didn't happen. Finally, around 3am, I tested my blood sugar, really wanting to sleep through until my alarm went off at 9am. BS: 8.4mmol/l. I was okay. But I still drank half a carton of apple juice, just to make myself feel better!

And then sleep did happen. I woke up on a 5.5mmol/l (yay) but that was with the apple juice I drank, which makes me think maybe I would have had a hypo without it?! We'll never know now. There haven't been many times when I haven't trusted my body: when I was first released from hospital after diagnosis, I was a nervous-wreck, as I didn't feel like I knew how to handle everything. Then there was my first experience of diabetic ketoacidosis (DKA). That was terrifying, and resulted in me sleeping in my housemate's bed for three days!

I need to get it back! Got a busy few days ahead, and functioning on limited sleep isn't going to make them any easier!