Fine.

For the last year, I've dealt with my diabetes on my own. I've had to. I went on my year abroad. No healthcare team, no family, no housemates. No one. And I learnt how to handle diabetes on my own. Yeah, it was tough, and I turned to the online community for support, but I did it. It's my biggest achievement to date. 

But now I'm not on year abroad. I'm home. In my uni town, with the friends I lived with in my first and second years of uni. I don't need to handle diabetes on my own. I have their support. After a year of managing it on my own, so to speak, I need to remind myself that they know how I deal with this and what to do in different situations. 

Last night, we went to our local pub and diabetes was not playing ball! High blood sugars all night, and on my first night back, of all times. Thanks, diabetes! And my housemate was concerned. And I kept on shooting him down telling him I was fine. It's my trademark saying. If things are good, I'm fine. If things are bad, I'm fine. I'm always fine. But he knows that "fine" doesn't always mean "fine". Last night was one of those occasions. And I was effed off.

I was annoyed that diabetes wouldn't play ball.

I was annoyed that it wouldn't play ball on my first night back.

And I was annoyed that my housemate wouldn't let it drop. 

But I shouldn't have been annoyed. I should have been grateful that he did notice that something wasn't right. I shouldn't have shot him down.

I need to remember that I'm back in a place where I have support. Time to break those year abroad habits.